Heather & Drew

I have been doing clinical in internal medicine now for 2.5 weeks. Things are going well and overall I am having a great experience. The doc I am with is a "trip" :) We have a lot of fun and see tons of patients each day. He also has been very generous in giving me time with Drew for things I feel very important for him. The two other students I am with are great fun, easy going and have wonderful attitudes. I hope next month will be kind as well, as I am doing a month in surgery with a doc who likely will not be so friendly.

Overall this week has been very trying.
I am desperately praying for Todor with the hope that he will be able to stay in the United States. It seems that the fabulous hospital he works at royally screwed up his visa paperwork from 6 1/2 years ago and there is a strong likelihood that he will be kicked back to Bulgaria for 2 years. If this happens he will not be able to re-enter the US. Even if we married he still gets the boot because he came into the US on a work visa. I found this out this evening and am feeling rather depressed and anxious over the whole thing. I don't know how Drew and I can survive med school and the distance from family and financial support and all the gifts that Todor has provided us which also allow us to live where the schools are great for Drew.

Not to mention the loss of the love of my life and the enormous positive impact Todor has made on Drew's life. All 3 of us will be absolutely heart broken. If his is not able to stay, it will feel as if he died. And that is the selfish part. Imagine how Todor must feel.

I was feeling low the past few days as my sister is transitioning to try and move here with us and feels very scared. Her fears are well understood, as I have stared the same fears straight in the face. With 3 months of my clinical rotations out of town I do not have anyone to be with Drew while I am gone and feel to be in a real bind. Beth, sis, was in a bind as well and we came up with the bright plan that she would come and live with me. In the mean time her life seems to have turned around and understandably, she has reservations to come to KS. She has a house and mortgage and many other ties to MN that are not easily dropped. I think now we have agreed that she will try 2 months here and see how it goes.

Please help us pray that everything will work out for the best for everyone involved.

As the walls feel to be crumbling inward, I point my nose skyward and pray for strength to dredge forward.